17 Days in Ashes

So I promised the tale of finding out I was going to become a mother but I have to start with my 17 day stay in the hospital.

As mentioned before; I was feeling run down, Dear Hubby and I had a challenging summer. Working two jobs quickly burned me out, Dear Hubby and I barely saw each other and the only communication we were having at a certain point were arguments. We planned for our annual trip to visit his clan and we were hoping that the time away would be good for us and it was. We hit complete rock bottom on that trip. We came home and had previously agreed to watch my Parental Units house and the Heir Apparent because while my parents think he can do no wrong the lack of opposable thumbs makes it difficult for him to feed himself.

During the week staying at my parents house I was feeling worse and worse. I had noticed a small bump on the back of my head before we left but assumed it was a pimple. I have a tendency to pick at things, especially when stressed and since we spent 5 days out of town with Dear Hubby's clan with the tension between us so thick you could cut it with a knife, I was picking. Before leaving for our vacation I had a cardiac stress test scheduled at my doctors office, while I was there I mentioned to the nurse I had a painful spot on the back of my head. He suggested it was folliculitus and that I should stop messing with it but had the doctor give me a prescription for an antibiotic. It didn't get better and 3 days after being back home I went to the doctors office again, this is where I should mention that while I like my GP, normally he won't touch you with a 10 foot pole. He will run almost every test under the sun on you yearly but if he could just email you the results of what is wrong I think he would prefer it, he does not have the best bedside manner but he is a damn good doctor.

He looked at the area, which I will admit was hard to see because I have really thick hair, I explained that I could barely move my neck I was in so much pain. He thought it was still folliculitis and I needed another round of a stronger antibiotics but before leaving he ordered a blood test. I got a phone call with 45 minutes telling me to go the closest Emergency Room because he was admitting me. My white blood count was over 3 times as high as normal.

17 days in Sunrise Hospital. I had a particularly nasty MRSA infection.

I got to stay in isolation in the ICU which the only nice thing was that meant I had my own room. It also meant everyone who was exposed to me had to be completely covered in PPE (personal protective equipment) gloves, gowns, masks. Everyone; Doctors, nurses, orderlies, my family and my friends. I don't know if you have ever spent 17 days in one room (Because having me leave the room wasn't an option) I only left for cat-scans. I had to have a PICC line inserted because I kept blowing out my IV's. I was miserable and Dear Hubby and I were still scraping the bottom of the barrel as far as our relationship went.

I missed my first week of classes, I went home with IV antibiotics. Literally I have never been sicker in my whole life. The fear and the reason for the long stay was that the area of the infection was so close to the brain stem that if the infection wasn't controlled quickly the doctors were afraid it would spread and your blogger would be worm food.

I obviously couldn't work during this time but like most corporate retail establishments my job acted like I was faking it.  So I could booze it up while hanging out at nightclubs and tanning at casino pool parties. I had to provide so much documentation and they still acted odd towards me. I worked 3 more shifts after being medically released and then they just never scheduled me again. I called and I tried to talk to the manager and the scheduler but everyone was always busy and no one would call me back. I took it as a sign that it was time to move on with life. My census job had ended before our vacation and Dear Hubby and I had finally got down to the nitty gritty in our relationship.

I mentioned we hit rock bottom on our trip, the things about rock bottom is you sometimes don't realize that it is rock bottom for a little while. We were very touch and go but ultimately we both honestly communicated that neither one of us had any desire to be with anyone else, that our marriage was most important and that both of us had to let go of some baggage we had been carrying around for years. My always working had caused distance, my fears that I needed to be perfect caused me to be a fake version of myself. There were just a lot of little things, we were both to blame but this is my story to tell and you would have to ask Dear Hubby if you wanted details from his perspective.

Like a phoenix our relationship rose from the ashes.