Saturday, September 26, 2009

This Really Important Blog about.... Oh Look a Bat!

I went to the doctors a few months ago; he was doing a routine stress test to make sure that everything was pumping in my chest like it should be. He decided to send me to an endocrinologist to have a spot on my thyroid examined closer. For most people this isn’t a big deal but in my family thyroids have been our Achilles heel. I asked the doctor if the spot on my thyroid could be causing any other problems, like attention problems. He didn’t think the two were related and said after I saw the endocrinologist we would talk about them.

I swear my Mother’s family crest has a bottle of vodka and a tumor on it (no one can remember what is on my Dad’s family crest, sorry, bad Alzheimer’s joke) my little sister was diagnosed with thyroid cancer at 25 and my Mom had hers removed when an internal goiter became so large that it inhibited her breathing.

I went to the endocrinologist, who also happens to be my little sister’s doctor. He said I look just like her and then ordered a biopsy, not cool. I don’t know the last time you had a needle repeatedly poked into your neck but it isn’t something I do often. No matter how much I tried to relax and think about other things I keep returning to one truth. There was a needle being poked repeatedly into my throat! So the results we negative, I am fine, with my family history they will keep an eye on any changes that occur in the area just to be on the safe side.

So I went back to the doctor’s office to talk about my attention issues. I was a dreamy little kid; I daydreamed and basically lived in my own world until I was in junior high. I was smart but often fell behind in school because the material didn’t hold my attention. Even in high school and my first attempt at college, I would routinely start with the greatest intentions only to be frustrated time and time again when I lost track of things during the semester. I am enrolled in college again and didn’t want to have to go through all of those old feelings again.

I have suspected for a while now that I suffered from Attention Deficient/Hyperactivity Disorder, the doctor spoke with me about my personal history and agreed that I exhibit ADHD-I (I stands for inattentive) symptoms. He gave me a prescription that my insurance doesn’t want to cover. So he started me on a different drug and while it helps I can tell it is not the right drug for me.

Everyone’s body chemistry is different so it is normal to have to try more than one medication before you find one that works well for you. I just don’t know how to call my doctor to tell him that the medication he just gave me a higher dose of is still not helping me focus.

Oh and BATS!!!

Monday, September 21, 2009

Who Can Feel Bad Looking at Kittens?

I am not up for much posting today, or much of last week but I felt I owed you all an update and since I honestly do believe that my blog is in the 2% of useful information you can find on the Internet I thought I should share that spotlight with a deserving little website.
It is hard to be down in the dumps looking at cute little kitties.
Meow, meow, meow.
I will be back to regular posting this week, sorry for the absence and the randomness.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Holey Moley StepMama Bear!

I was reading a blog by my friend AmyK, while her situation is a little different than ours with the Rapscallion, I feel like she used some imagery that really hit home with me about why I fight so hard for the Rapscallion.

She talks about holes in our skids lives, holes they may not have if they came from an intact biofamily. Holes that have an effect on the child, slack in the line of their lives that doesn’t let them fly as high as they should, doesn’t let them be the children they should get to be and causes them to grow up too early. All this slack, all these holes affect the children and as the stepmom I feel like it is my job to pick up the slack, I feel like it is my job to protect the Rapscallion from the holes.

Like AmyK’s Kidlet, the Rapscallion has 2 houses that he goes back and forth into, he also stays a week at a time in each house and I have wondered sometimes what all the changing does to him. Like AmyK, I hope he feels at home at our house. In our house we try to remain consistent, involved, loving and fun. At Bio Mom’s house we have no control, we can’t control when he is exposed to things that we disagree with like anger, fighting, and negativity.

One of those “holes” opened up in his life again this week while he was at Bio Mom's, because of it we will change the weeks that the Rapscallion is in our custody to try and protect him from false accusations. Dear Hubby has to go to a meeting with Bio Mom about this “hole” and as much as I know Bio Mom doesn’t want me going, I am going to support my husband, my stepson, my family and even her because he may not have fallen out of my crotch but he is my kid none the less and I feel an overwhelming need to protect my family during this time.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Night Owl Audtioning for Part of Early Bird

I am a night-owl who would like nothing better than to be an early bird. I am not ashamed of my night-owl tendencies but it is inconvenient when you live in a house full of early risers. Both Dear Hubby and The Rapscallion love to greet the dawn, while the only one who wants to hit the snooze and hide under the covers with me is Cat Butt.

My boys love to go outside and be active, I love to cuddle up and read a book but somehow we have to find a common ground and that common ground is me looking for ways to become a more pleasant early riser.

I have worked very hard on myself in the last few weeks. I am enrolled in college, attending an English class. I have lost a little over 7 pounds by eating well and walking Puppy Butt. I have gone to the Doctor to discuss how I was feeling out of control, depressed and frustrated. After some discussion and research Doctor and I agree that I have most likely suffered from ADHD-I most of life. I fought the insurance company who told me that the drug prescribed by my doctor was not going to be covered for me since I was over the age of 20. We have compromised with what I feel is an inferior drug just to start. I am only on my second day of these meds, we will see how they go, and I can already tell you that the dosage is too low.

Next step on the challenge is to start trying to wake up earlier and spend more time outside. I would like to enjoy hiking, biking and camping more than I do. I know I would enjoy hiking more if I brought my camera/got a better camera so I could take pictures. I enjoy biking but I am such a slow rider I feel like I hold Dear Hubby back, I guess as I get into better physical shape that will become easier and as I start enjoying morning time more camping could be more enjoyable.
Saturday is my first hike, I will bring my camera and let you know how it goes.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Making Friends and Influencing People

Yesterday was my first day back in school, I am taking my English requirement this semester, and it is a 5 credit class which means a lot of work for yours truly. I was nervous going into class; I haven’t been in school in almost 10 years. I was afraid of being one of the oldest and maybe the only one in the class who honestly doesn’t know the correct usage for a semicolon. I can’t remember the parts of speech beyond what I help the Rapscallion with and he is only in second grade. I write like I talk and it is only through the magic of Microsoft Word that my grammar is anything close to being correct.

I arrived at the campus early so I could purchase my textbook and find the classroom, I stopped at the help desk to get a hard copy of my schedule and I found out that the college still has me listed by my last name from when I was married to Whatshisface, so tomorrow I have to bring a copy of my divorce decree from Whatshisface and my marriage license to Dear Hubby (ladies this is why you should NOT change your name when you get married) to have my name corrected in the system. I found my classroom pretty easily; I glanced through the textbook, looks like it is all written in English and finally went into the room about 10 minutes before the class was to start.

The dilemma of where to sit, all the seats in the back were full, plus lets all admit I don’t mind being the center of attention but sitting in the front row would single me out as a nerd. An old, returning to college after 10 years, semiliterate, know-it-all nerd and we all know there is nothing worst than fulfilling your worst ideas about yourself. Luckily I found an open desk near the middle of the room.

The Professor, who has told us we can call him Steve so I will now refer to him as Professor Steve, was running late. When he came into the room I assumed he was another student, he was wearing cargo shorts and a t-shirt with a Spam logo on it. He looked older than me but not by much, now here is where I reveal how shallow I am, I always check out peoples shoes. You can tell so much by them, his shoes were kind of ratty old Vans but the biggest thing I noticed was that he was wearing 2 different shoes. 2 different colored shoes, I should explain; 1 black with a white stripe and a white sole, the other grey with a white stripe and a rubber sole.

He started class telling us a little bit about what we would be studying this semester; he then opened the floor for questions. He said we could ask him any question we wanted, so you know what I asked right.

Turns out he didn’t know he was wearing 2 different shoes, I guess I better proofread every essay I turn in this semester.