For Sale

For Sale Cheap! O.B.O.

One annoying Cat Butt and

One gassy Puppy Butt.

For the right price might throw

in a mouthy 8 year old.

Call tired, annoyed

Mom with all offers.

Puppy Butt had gas last night, she got into the trash and ate some broccoli (just a couple of pieces, don't go calling ASPCA on me) had a tummy ache all night. Cat Butt has decided sleeping ON MY HEAD is a great idea, but she has to come in and out of the room all night not to mention that she has to announce herself every time she comes into the room.

I guess these guys are lucky I love them.

Confused Rambings of a Night Owl

So I am up too late again, this is becoming a weird routine. I used to wish that I could be an early morning person, one of those people who went to bed early and woke up refreshed ready to seize the day in the morning. Instead I have become a person who is more comfortable awake when the sun is asleep. I know alot of this has to do with my current work situation, or more honestly my lack of work situation. I have been designing necklaces but that doesn't really require set hours.

I have suffered from sleep issues since I was a kid, I remember I had a whole year from the day I turned 10 until my 11th birthday, I was not able to sleep at night. The only exception was when I would sleep in my little sisters room, I was suffering from terrible reoccurring dreams.

Now I find myself suffering something very similar, only it is not a reoccurring nightmare, it is my inability to let go of the stress of the day. I get very panicky when I think about all the things in my life that I can't control. I stress about the direction my life has taken, I stress about poor decisions that I have made that are still affecting me and my family. I can feel my body tense up even right now as I think about these issues.

The hardest part about this time in my life right now is that I would rather hide than deal with anything. I would rather act like a child, I would rather put my head in the sand, I would rather daydream, anything other than deal with the reality of being an adult but I don't have this choice because my loving husband does not want to be married to a child. He wants a wife and a partner, I think he is being fair, I know I am not.

I get so overwhelmed by the enormity of life, the complexity of dealing with the relationships I am involved in. I know I am procrastinating and being lazy, I know I should be the early bird.

I just don't know how.