What Goes Around

I have tried to live my life simply, kindly and with much love. That has not always been easy, I am a stepmother to a 7 year old boy, we live 5 houses from bio-mom. While I have worked hard to get along with her and her family, it has not been easy. I worked for a soulless-retailer where I was taken advantage of and a coworker routinely lied about me.

One principle I have tried to honor is Karma, I put positive energy and love into my world in hopes that it will return to me. Tonight I got to see a glimmer of the Karma in my world. I got a phone call from an old coworker, this was after emails from old coworkers bursting to tell me that the negative coworker I had struggled so hard with was walked out of the store and fired. She apparently had been making racist comments and was overheard and reported by both coworkers and customers.

I never wished negativity on her but it was inevitable because of how she chooses to live her life, nothing is good enough, she can not let go of past hurt and forgive. She is spiteful, petty, shallow and hateful. I hope that she can learn to forgive, it is amazing how much forgiveness will change your life, if you don't Karma will catch up to you.

I don't believe that bad things only happen because of past negativity in my life, sometimes I need to be challenged and sometimes I need to be shown that I am not strong enough to get through things alone, but that is another blog about beliefs.

Much love!

From Wikipedia:

"Everything that we have ever thought, spoken, done or caused is Karma; as is also that which we think, speak or do this very moment. Actions performed consciously are weighted more heavily than those done unconsciously. But just as poison affects us if taken unknowingly, suffering caused unintentionally will also give appropriate karmic effect. We are in position to do something about our destiny by doing the right thing at the right time. Through positive actions, pure thoughts, prayer, mantra and meditation, we can resolve the influence of the karma in present life and turn the destiny for the better. A spiritual master knowing the sequence in which our Karma will bear fruit, can help us. As humans, we have the opportunity to speed up our spiritual progress with practice of good Karma. We produce negative karma because we lack knowledge and clarity"

"...Sinner"

I think I have firmly established that I am not perfect, in fact I am far from it but I received the above message from someone that stung a little. I know I should not care what other people think but sometimes I do, there was a time when I lived my life with more consideration of what people thought and since this message came from someone that knew me well during that time I guess I am a little more sensitive about it. The humor is this person doesn't know the beginning of my transgressions, they were making a statement based solely on my body art and their prejudice against it.

My path to this place in my life has not been easy, I have struggled with and against myself mostly. I have some things I am not proud of but at the same time I am not ashamed of anything I have had to go through, it has made me who I am and most days I like the woman I am. I wish I hadn't been so stubborn, maybe I would have learned the lessons that life was trying to teach me sooner.

I don't think I am done with this topic, just done for now. I need to contemplate more on why this struck me the wrong way before I can articulate it fully.